belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
