if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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