dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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