I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
