Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
