whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
