i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
