Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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