There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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