help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I don't deserve a penis
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Randomize
