Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
third nipple confirmed
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
