Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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