People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
false alarm, still single
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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