He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
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