I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
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