the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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