is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
