Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Randomize
