it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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