How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
