hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
