New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
