like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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