he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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