Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize