This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
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His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
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The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize