Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
