She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
