so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
