But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
