is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
