He disabled his match.com account in front of me
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize