All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
