At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
