omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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