I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
