the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
