captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
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