I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
