i permit you to call me
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
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