Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize