these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
