go do what you do best...puke behind churches
im holly from the hills drunk
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
