He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Randomize
