After last night, I could never be a politician.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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