But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
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you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
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I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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