I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Congratulations! We have a period
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