i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
