Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.