Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
