So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
