I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
