I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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